I heard what was our song on the radio was yesterday. I got halfway through before I had to turn it off. I thought I could handle it, but I just couldn’t. I thought I was moving on. In a small way I am. I still love you and still miss you, but each day it’s a little less. I accept the fact that you’re gone and not coming back. Each day is a little lighter then the last. Every once in a while the dark clouds return and rain on me for a bit. I try not to let it bother me. I’m getting better at ignoring the rain and moving on.
There are new people in my life now, old friends, new friends and friends I forgot I had. I don’t know if I’m just using them as distraction from my life or not. I try to concentrate on keeping my mind busy, keeping occupied. I’m trying new things and it seems to be working. One new friend has inspired me to take the plunge and do something I’ve always wanted to do but never bothered trying.
In a way, you still inspire me. I still want to be a better man. You gave me lightness for 12 years and I thank you for that. I never thought I deserved some one like you, and I guess I was right all along. I will never speak an ill word of you. You are an amazing person and I’m honored knowing that I was in your heart for that time we were together.
It’s time to move on.