Monday, August 16, 2010

Far away by my side

Saturday night I was lonely. I haven’t felt that way in a long time. It wasn’t a sad type of lonely; more like I wish someone was here to enjoy this movie with me lonely. I don’t get that way too often. I’ve worked hard on being alone and happy. For the most part, I am enjoying my time alone. I can do whatever I want when I want and answerer to no one. I took my happy alone self to a movie yesterday. I’ve never done that before. It was a little strange at first, but in the end it was ok. I’m still wont eat at restaurants alone or go to concerts alone. I won’t be visiting any amusement parks by myself anytime soon, but I am getting used to being alone and comfortable.

For the most part, seeing couples still bums me out. I think to myself, I miss that. I don’t regret my decision not to date or see anybody. I don’t want to be with the wrong person just because I don’t want to be alone. I thought I was ready earlier to start dating again, but I was wrong. For now, I’ll be happy on my own with the people that I love far away and by my side.

Mental health note:

I’m starting to feel like me again. Stopping the Lithium was the right choice.

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